Laziness Is The Worst Lover
by Freida Right
Summary: The Festival of Lights is a yearly celebration of love. and this year, Palom finds himself... in love! will he take the easy road, or bring out his true colors? Valentine's Day Fic-A-Thon! Prompt: love potions.


Hello, Palom! He's my sweetheart, and probably always will be. XD

Haha, look at me missing Valentine's Day! If only I had more time, but Valentine's Day came at a really hectic time this year. This is for the "A Home For The Edge and Rydia Shippers" first annual Valentine's Day Fic-A-Thon. For those of you new to it, the deets are in my profile until the evening of February 28. feel free to jump in and join the fun! 8D

The prompt is love potions; there is a double-pairing, one involving Palom and a girl who will certainly make an appearance in _From Me To You_, and the other involving Porom and an OC of mine I had nearly forgotten about.

Also... Ignore the number of double entendres in this, as it seems alarming to me. Maybe I'm just paranoid about Apple's confounded Autocorrect (it's like god), or maybe chef school has just poisoned my brain beyond reconciliation. I dunno. In any case, the English language is awful. Enjoy!

2222222222

_Laziness Is The Worst Lover_

2222222222

Palom was sure he had hit upon his best idea yet: if he began to brew and sell assorted love potions, it could make him a billionaire over night. Perhaps he had no use for them, but he knew plenty of people who did.

Well... Alright, so maybe his latest get-rich-quick scheme wasn't entirely selfless. He just wasn't sure how else to talk to the pretty, red-headed red mage from the academy. Palom had only been aware of her for a month or two now; but from the first moment he had seen her, an outstanding part of an otherwise normal crowd, he had been smitten. Finally, he understood everything Edge had told him in the past about girls. The ninja had spent years trying to warn him, that girls had an unusual effect on the mind of a teenage boy, and that when he did reach his teens, he would suddenly understand all too well.

He had spent all those years laughing at the ninja, oblivious. These days, he found himself rolling his eyes at his own stupid self. Why did he always have to be so thick?

So now, Palom faced an annoying dilemma. He had never been particularly shy about speaking his mind in the past; but the red-headed Mage always robbed him of words. He kept assuring himself that it wouldn't happen the next time he saw her, and he would finally inform her of his feelings. After all, he was the amazing Palom Farxhae, black Mage prodigy, former Warrior of Light and a savior of the world. How could she think of rejecting him? It should have been easy...

But he was finding out the hard way that it was not as easy as it appeared. Whenever he saw her, his knees would suddenly become weak, and all his resolve melted into a pathetic puddle of goo in his stomach. It always forced him to retreat without even bothering to try and approach her. Weeks had gone by like this, and he still didn't even know her name. He wasn't even sure of she was aware of him.

Well, that was a stupid assumption-of course she knew about him. But surely, she didn't realize how lucky she was to have his secret affections.

But now the yearly Festival of Lights was approaching. Like Wintermas, it was a beautiful celebration of life's wonders in the middle of the dark, cold winter. And the upcoming festival specifically celebrated the joys of romantic love. Now that he was actually _in_ love for the first time in his life, it seemed a shame to Palom that he should spend it alone. He needed a solution. And quickly.

Seeing that the festival was later that month and he still couldn't grapple with his feelings, he deemed it best to take the easier route and look into brewing an effective love potion. He had been schooled before on the dangers of such brews-once by Edge, even-but in this hour of desperation, he didn't care anymore.

He had spent several days researching the delicate art, and finally felt like he had stumbled upon a proper potion. It was an entry-level recipe, requiring minimal equipment or time, and easily aquired ingredients. The effects weren't serious or permanent, causing only a mild infatuation in the drinker to the first person of the opposite sex she saw.

Which Palom was determined would be _him_.

He didn't really mind doing serious research, as long as the topic was pertinent and interesting to him. And it seemed to have paid off. Heck, this was easy enough; maybe, if he got really good at this, he could briefly major in it and make good money at it. Feeling mightily pleased with himself, he gathered a few things and set to work.

He had already filled a small cauldron with the base liquid-fragrant rosewater diluted with plain, pure rain water-and set it to boil and reduce for a bit, when Porom suddenly stormed into the work kitchen, looking upset. She slammed the door behind her, making her twin jump in surprise, and leaned heavily against it.

"Boys," she groaned. "You're a pain, the lot of you."

"What's the matter with you now?" He asked, covering the cauldron and hoping she didn't notice what he was doing.

"It's Ivri," she answered. "He's been so distant all week. And when I brought up the festival this month, he gave me this weird, unimpressed look and then ran off. I think he's cheating on me."

That was a little alarming. Ivri went to the same academy as the red-headed girl, and he was a white Mage. Palom had to admit that the guy was kind of cute, with his messy blonde hair, his face covered with freckles and spectacles, and that he was a decent match for Porom. He was shy but very serious about his art; the two of them could spend hours in deep, philosophical discussion on their shared magic. The idea that he would dare to run around on a smart, sweet girl like her was far outside his nature.

But more importantly, he had hurt Porom's feelings. That was enough to make Palom want to hunt him down and punch him in his bespectacled mug.

"What are you going to do about it?" He asked.

"I'm not sure yet," she said sadly, and then looked up, gazing thoughtfully around the room with a suspicious face. "...Palom, why does it smell like roses in here?"

"Oh... No reason."

"What's that in your cauldron? What are you up to? Don't tell me you're making a love potion! Those are dangerous!"

Well, feh. How did she read him so well?

"I just started," he informed her, uncovering the simmering, rose scented liquid. "I'm not sure what else to do, either."

"You could always, I don't know, talk to the girl, like a civilized person."

"And I will. This will just make it a little easier. All it does is a case of the butterflies for, like, an hour is youre lucky. Actually, it sounds like you could use some, too. The recipe yields two servings. I was going to save the other serving, just in case of emergencies, but you could use it more."

Porom scoffed indignantly and rolled her eyes. "If Ivri is in love with someone else, I don't know how much good a silly, temporary infatuation would do. When it wares off, he won't care anymore. And then he'll hate forever for tricking him like that."

"You're too good for your own good, sis," Palom said, adding a prescribed pinch of wormwood to his potion. "This is harmless."

"I'm going to leave you to learn this the hard way, brother. For myself," she decided, straightening herself professionally, "I'm going to do this properly, honestly. Like I care about him, because I do."

"Ah. Have fun with that."

"Fine. And you have fun with this." And with that, she left to seek comfort and council elsewhere.

With her out of the way, Palom returned to his potion, feeling less like a cowardly slug without her to criticize him. The short list of ingredients all had some sort of chemical property to them, causing energy and serotonin levels to spike briefly; the rest was left up to simple but potent incantations. As he added lucious berries, sweet citrus essences, and bitter ground bark of various trees, the liquid quickly took on a deep red color and began to smell spicy and rich. But it was sure to taste very bitter, indeed.

When all the ingredients had been added to the cauldron, he left it to simmer while he looked back over the recipe. He had glanced over the incantations, which he had assumed to be simple and straightforward. But his heart lurched suddenly, when he read that the incantation required the name of the intended drinker.

And he still didn't know her name!

But then, Ivri went to school with her. Surely, he would know her name. Plus, Palom wanted very much to know what the guy was doing, to have upset Porom so badly. A quick chat with him would be productive for everyone. While he waited on his potion to reach an acceptable consistency, he cleaned up his workspace until no trace of his doings was obvious to anyone. Then he stowed his potion out of the way and took off.

2222222222

Palom went looking for Ivri at the boy's own house, and knocked on the door. A woman in the robes of a red Mage answered him, and gave him a smile.

"Oh, if it isn't Palom Faraxhae. How may I help you, young man?"

"I was looking for Ivri, ma'am. Is her around?"

"My son is in the park right now, studying, I shouldn't wonder. On an errand for your sister, are we?"

"Sort of..."

"Remind him to be home for dinner. He loses track of time, when he's reading."

Promising he would relay the message, Palom headed for the park. He found his quarry sitting on a bench beneath a shaded tree, dressed in normal clothes that did nothing to reveal his practice. Instead of studying anything, Ivri was writing in a notebook, but still oblivious to the time or the chill of the winter wind. Actually, Ivri was one of the few people in the park; not many preferred to be out in the cold weather. Palom fought to keep from shivering, himself.

Loving an opportunity to be surprising and irreverent, he sat right down on the bench next to Ivri, causing the white mage to jump. In fact, he looked a bit frightened to have his personal bubble so rudely interrupted-and by his girlfriend's rather jealous twin, no less.

"I heard I'd find you here," he said, being obnoxiously chipper. He was still prepared to beat the boy, if the situation called for it. "So, what are you up to? Kinda cold to be out, don't you think?"

Ivri nervously straightened his glasses and shut his notebook with a snap. "Oh, uh, nothing much, I guess... I mean, the weather's nice."

"Nah. It's too cold for me," Palom answered with a grimace, wrapping his arms around himself. "Too cold for Porom, too, you know. She hates it."

"Yeah, I know... Oh, I've upset her, haven't I? I really didn't mean to. I just can't have her finding out, yet."

"Finding out what?"

Ivri's green eyes flicked abut, making sure no one would hear before answering, "We'll, you're her brother, so... You won't tell her, will you? I've been planning her a surprise. For the festival, right? I'm meeting her there with music, and candles, and flowers-not roses, of course, their pollen makes her sneeze. I'm bringing her lilies, instead, the yellow ones she loves so much. You know... Things she likes."

Whew, that was a relief to hear. Palom couldn't help but be touched by this blatant show of affection. And Porom would appreciate it very much, too; Ivri knew her very well. Maybe a bit too well, for Palom's comfort, but he would allow it, just this once.

"Actually, I had a question for you, Ivri."

"For me?"

"Yeah. You know that red-head you go to school with?"

"I know a few."

"She's a red Mage, and she's a girl?"

"Oh, you must mean Bethany. She has a dangerous obsession with ice spells."

"Do you know if she's, you know, involved with anybody?"

Ivri's eyes lit up behind his glasses. "Are you going to ask her to the festival? She'd like you, I think. She is very much like you."

Palom tried not too blush, but it happened any way. "Please don't tell anyone."

"I won't. And no, she is not involved with anyone that I know of. So, good luck with her. You're very brave for trying; her Blizzard spell alone is terrifying."

"I think I can handle that," he agreed, rising to head home. "Also, your mom said to be home for dinner. It's getting late, isn't it?"  
"I suppose you're right. I'll be leaving in a few minutes, then. Enjoy the rest of your evening, Palom."

"And you, too, Ivri. I'll see you at the festival, then."

_Huh. What a guy,_ he thought with a smile as he walked home. _And to think, I was going to smash his face in. He really appreciates her, doesn't he? Probably even more than I do... I have to remember to buy him a drink sometime._

2222222222

As soon as he arrived back at the tower, Palom went straight to kitchen to look in on his potion. But when he opened the cabinet where he has so carefully hidden it, his heart skidded to a halt. The cauldron was missing.

"Misplaced something, have we, Palom?"

He turned around to find the elder standing in the door behind him, an unimpressed but slightly amused look on his grizzled face. Palom sighed, resigning himself to his fate.

"Okay, I know what you're thinking, sir-"

"And the answer is and always will be no, my son. You know well what we have said about love potions in the past. They are a danger to all people. Their very existence is a blasphemy of our art, and I would have them obliterated entirely, if I had my way."

Palom shoved his hands into his pockets. "Yeah, I know..."

The elder's face softened, and he came to lay a sympathetic hand on the boy's shoulder. "Such conniving schemes are for the weak of will and the lazy of heart. And we all know too well that you are neither, Palom Faraxhae. Laziness is the worst lover, and real love has no tolerance for it. If it is a romance that matters you seek, approach it with your very best self. Otherwise, leave it for those who have earned it."

Palom's first thought was that this was overwhelmingly daunting; and it must have shown on his face.

"Be brave, my boy. It has always been in you. All that's left to do is to put it into practice. You will do just fine."

"Sure. Tell that to my knees."

The elder laughed shortly to that. "The first step on any journey is always the most difficult. If only you dare to take it, walking that road can be easier than expected. Ah, for youth, and painful joys that come with it. At this old age, it becomes a collection of scars. And wisdom. One day, you will look back on these feelings and laugh in their smug faces. And when you have young sons, grappling with the same feelings in their time, you will advise them with a sage confidence."

That was an uplifting thought. Finally, Palom managed a hopeful smile. "Thank you for that. I guess I needed it."

The elder smiled back, patted his shoulder, and took his leave. Alone again, Palom stood in silence for a bit, pondering everything his mentor had said.

_Maybe I should take a page from Ivri's book of magic,_ he decided. _If he can do it, I guess I can, too._

2222222222

The day of the festival dawned a few weeks later, and he still hadn't spoken to Bethany yet. But that was part of his new, heartfelt plan-he had taken some time to craft a special surprise for her instead, involving his Blizzaja spell. Something he knew she would appreciate. And he was very excited to unveil it at the festival that evening.

Porom, on the other hand, was very anxious.

"I'm still not sure what to do about Ivri yet," she lamented. "If he'd rather spend the festival with someone else, what am I doing holding him back like this?"

"Ivri couldn't cheat on you if he had the nerve to do it," Palom assured her, wishing she would calm down. There wasn't much he could say to her without giving away the surprise that awaited her tonight. And when everything became clear... She would feel so much better. He wished that he could be there to see the look on her face.

But it was between her and her boyfriend. Besides, Palom had other things to do.

That night as they ventured to the festival grounds, he kept his eyes open for Bethany, hoping to spot her quickly. His sister fretted beside him in silence the whole way. Finally, she made a decision.

"I'll just ask him outright when I find him, and get the truth. I need to know."

"You need to have a little faith in the guy. He may surprise you."

"...You know something. I knew it all along! What's going on?"

"You'll find out when you get there, Porom. Sheesh, chill out for once."

She didn't say another word after that. She didn't even bother excusing herself when she left him, walking alone into the crowd, presumabley after Ivri. That taken care of, Palom resumed his own search.

And he finally spotted Bethany from a short distance. To his disappointment, she was with someone already-a boy he didn't recognize, dressed in the robes of a black magic student. He was chatting away about something, and he had her full attention... But she looked very bored and uninterested.

That actually boded pretty well. Still from a distance, he followed after them until they stopped near a drink stand. The boy excused himself and turned to place an order, leaving her looking rather relieved.

_Now's my chance_, Palom decided, trying to ignore the usual weakness in his knees. He took a deep breath, and walked right up to her with his heart pounding.

_Be charming, be charming, be charming, don't say anything stupid..._

Bethany noticed him at once and gave him a friendly smile. "Oh, hello," she said brightly. "I was wondering if you would be here tonight, Palom. Having fun yet?"

"Um, yeah, yeah, loads of fun," he agreed, trying to not trip over his own words. "And you?"

"Um..." She answered vaguely, looking over at her date and making a doubtful face. "Modertately..."

"So... No, then?"

She sighed sadly. "No, not really."

"Huh... Me, neither. Turns out the girl I wanted to ask to this thing was already with someone."

"Go figure," she harrumphed. "The guy I was hoping would ask me never did. And Jonathan... I mean, he's a nice boy and all, but its all about him, you know? 'Me, me, me, me, me'. I've barley gotten two words in all evening. Kinda depressing, really."

"That's a shame. Hey, I think I saw something back there that might cheer you up. Wanna see?"

Her bright green eyes lit up. "I'd love to."

"Come on, this way," he said, offering his arm. He was shaking slightly from nerves, and he hoped tht Bethany would blame it on the chill of the night. In either case, she gladly accepted and let her lead her away.

"What is it?" She asked.

"It's a surprise."

"We'll, you've got me excited. So, you're studying to be the next elder, am I right?"

"Yeah," he agreed dryly. "I'm the elder's nephew, so everyone just kind of expects it. But I'm really not sure what I want to do with my life. All that studying, advising people, sitting still, I don't know. It's really more of my sister's thing. I always pictured myself as more of a globe-trotter. There's too much to see and do to just stay here forever."

"I want to travel, too," Bethany said happily. "Oh, but you've been all over the world. You know how to get around by now. I'm sure it's easy for you."

"Sometimes. I mean, we've all got lives. Most of my good friends all have kids and kingdoms to look after."

"Have you ever considered teaching? You'd probably be very good at it."

Palom laughed shortly and shook his head. "I haven't got the patience."

"I think that's what I'd like to do. Though I wouldn't mind doing it somewhere... Else. I feel like I'm done here, in Mysidia. I'd like to take our knowledge out into the world. It just sounds so _grand_, don't you think?"

"I'll have to hook you up with some people. I know a few queens who would get a kick out of that."

Bethany gave him a very genuine smile. "Palom, how come we've never just, you know, hung out before? I dont think we've ever even spoken until now. It's a shame."

He wasn't sure how to answer for a moment. Given that he had plotted before to slip her a love potion, he felt silly. And terrible.

"It's a travesty. Oh look, we're here!"

The tent he had brought her to was very big and open, and filled with monumental ice sculptures. Before they even stepped inside, Bethany's eyes went wide and her jaw dropped.

"I heard they were doing a display this year," he explained as he led her inside. "I also heard that you like the blizzard spells. I thought you'd like to see."

"I'd heard about it to! I had so wanted to see this! I'll bet Jonathan hadn't heard about it at all."

"Forget about him. You're with me now. Come over here; this isn't all I wanted to show you."

The sculpture he brought her to was kind of ametureish compared to the others; but it was still very beautiful. It was an eagle, with its great wings spread and ready t take flight. The details of its feathers stood out a little too much, and he still felt like the beak was too big in proportion to the rest of the head... But over all, not bad for a first-eight-try.

"What do you think, Bethany?"

She admired it thoughtfully for a moment or two. "I think whoever did this was a beginner, and in a bit of a hurry."

"Yeah, me too."

"...You did this, didn't you?"

"Not bad, right?"

"For me?"

"What can I say?" He said with a shrug. "When words fail, I let my magic do the talking."

Her smile broadened, and she looked the sculpture over with a newfound appreciation. "I take it all back. It's beautiful. Perfect. It's my favorite of all the sculptures here. I absolutely love it."

Her hand slid down his arm, and her fingers intertwined with his. All of a sudden, Palom didn't feel so cold anymore. In fact, he felt warm to the touch.

"Remember when I said the girl I wanted to ask was already with someone? It was you."

"Remember when I said the boy I wanted to ask me never did? It was _you_."

They must have spent another hour wandering around the festival, hand in hand, just talking about things. The displays and showcases and merchant booths were bright and colorful to look at, he supposed; but Bethany, his new friend, was by far more investing. She was a clever girl who shared his goofy sense of humor, and she had a bit of a mischievous streak as well. And she was intelligent, a great pleasure to talk to.

_How stupid have I been, too terrified to speak to her at all? I don't think I've ever liked anybody but my sister this much. The elder was right. Now that we're here, I'm glad I came._

After a while, they even found Porom and Ivri in the crowd. They, too, were waking hand in hand, and Porom looked very happy. Exuberant, even. And small, bell-shaped lilies had materialized in her hair, bright white against nut brown. She was also wearing a glittering amethyst pendant on a silver chain that he didn't recognize. When she saw her brother, she ran straight to him and threw her arms around his neck.

"Oh, darn you, Palom, I should have just listened to you!"

"Finally, you understand that," he agreed, rolling his eyes as he hugged her back.

"You should have seen it-it was amazing!" She squealed, jumping a little from excitement. "He brought me these lilies, and this necklace, and he even wrote me a song! He played it himself, on his guitar!"

"...I didn't know Ivri played the guitar."

Porom beamed. "He's learning. He started so he could do this tonight. He gave me all my favorite things-the lilies, this beautiful necklace, even those fancy chocolates I like so much. The ones with the cream inside that are so expensive?"

Palom imagined his eyebrows must have been climbing higher and higher as she explained it all. It felt like they were about to sprout wings and fly off his face. "No way," he said, looking past his sister to Ivri. "You must have spent a small fortune on all this!"

Porom promptly smacked him over the head. "Don't ask things like that," she scolded, blushing mightily. "It's impolite!"

On either side of them, Ivri and Bethany her laughing at their friend's antics.

"It's lucky they've got us now, they'd beat each other to death," Bethany commented.

"Shall we all walk together, then?" Ivri suggested helpfully. "It would be easy to keep an eye on them that way."

That was quickly agreed on, and the four friends started off together. It was exactly the way things should always be. Remembering something, Palom out his arm around Ivri's shoulder.

"You're alright, for the guy who's dating my sister. I like you."

"Wow, really?"

"Yeah, really! Remind me sometime, I owe you a drink."


End file.
